Born under twin stars
To a ready made family ready for another
But not quite finished
Scared whimpers foreshadowing the pain I would have to endure
Running toward frigid water in mid November, shoes and corduroy overalls and all, held back by my mother
Colorado and a big chair, french braids and my idol
Barbecue and Christmas trees
The morning, I always knew I was less
Cars racing, Chicago
Trains rushing, Los Angeles
Abundance, Washington D.C.
Scared of needles, until I couldn’t be anymore
Bottles with too many pills
Once, then again and again
Fire kisses my face
And I can’t breathe
A hand pressed against my throat
Or maybe there isn’t and it isn’t and there’s nothing and it’s nothing and I’m nothing
Learning to protect myself, facetious
Learning to love,
Learning to let go.