Category: permission

To your mother –
your father –
your sisters.
To me.

Your soul enlightened each and every day.
A soul too eager;
too intellectual –
too beautiful.

I saw the way you felt;
about life –
graceful, everchanging.
About the universe-
unsuspecting, unreasonable.

You cherished
creativity through voice.
Your expression,
determination.

We used to talk
talk about things we barely understand:
nirvana –
love and happiness –
sadness.

We agreed:
we had no idea where
we would end up.
It didn’t matter.

As long as there was
love,
enjoyment;
in every fiber of our being.
Through every action
of every day we lived.

You loved the idea of
starting over.
Moving on to a new life
encompassing contentment;
hope.

You let yourself fill with
discontent,
indignation.
Only seen,
if you allowed.

It built up,
compressed,
petrified.
But you never let it out.

I wish you would have let it burst.
I wanted you to let it explode
and pour out of your mind.
Like sand –
release the weight inside.

Yet instead,
you tied a knot.
One that will never be undone.
sand turned into rocks
and pulled you to the bottom of the ocean.

You would never let
emotions;
taint how you loved the world.
Instability;
dull the flame inside you.

The perfect release,
you found your nirvana.
Expelled beauty through your existence
and the world soaked it up.

When folding clouds roll
across a rose and lavender
stained sky.

When the moonlight
tears the ocean in half;
and the waves try to heal themselves.